The Impulsive Aries

Dear Diary,

I’m sorry I keep yakking about my life nowadays. [Yakking. I just learned that earlier by the way] You know how much I miss you. I thought of you the moment I stepped inside that jeepney ride on my way home. It was a long thought process. Any general transcriptionist would be having a hard time typing in those words that came out from my mind earlier. But here I am. Still writing those retro-thoughts.

I actually enrolled myself in another training today. Yes. And it’s not a small thing kind of training like my previous one. It’s a big thing. I say so because it’s a job dude. I mean, you can’t just screw up stuffs like this [insert sarcasm here]. We signed papers and all. . . but I really doubt if I will be able to stick with the policies that that paper was yakking about. [Sorry for the excessive use of the word yakking] I [secretly] still have plans of being a nurse someday. It’s a long term thing my parents would say so. “Think of long term careers.” We’ll see. Opportunity knocked once on my door and I just had to grab it. I signed the thing and didn’t told my parents about my decision. I was afraid. They don’t want me to be in a call center. But right now, I think they’re gulping the reality. They’re far away. So, they really can’t stop me from pursuing it. Also, at that time, I felt like it was one of the downest moments of my entire life. I just couldn’t figure out what to do while waiting for those hospitals to hire me or just even interview me. I was plain lost. And I had to find out what will happen if I chose this path. And yah, again, here I am now. Still awake. And trying to fight the urge to sleep.

It’s really quite a new environment for me too. And the people there, my batchmates, are just great. Oh, maybe not all. But to sum up, they were great and fun to be with. I learned a lot of things just by observing them and listening to their stories. One time, they were talking about virginity. And I was like, “Woah, is it a sin to be a virgin right now?” But they didn’t interrogate me much. I just smiled when they asked me. It’s safe to just smile at times. It leaves the person with nothing. It’s like between the yes/no kind of answer.

I try to be a wallflower in the group. But I also try to participate at times. Our trainer always ask us to read something on the board or asks us random questions that she just feels like asking, so you don’t have a choice but to participate and join in the discussion. I was actually happy earlier. I learned a lot of things in our lecture. And for the first time, I was really interested. In every part of the lecture. I was an eager, hungry, virgin trainee. Teehee! 😉

Anyways, I’m afraid that I am now contradicting to the paper that I signed earlier. One of the company’s policy is about “Internet Blogging.” But I guess there’s nothing wrong with what I’m writing to you right now, right? It’s just merely stating facts and some feelings that [I know] wouldn’t affect other people and the company. Am I right? Internet blogging by the way is a level 3 offense. But I guess that only covers blogs pertaining to the company’s and staffs’ reputation and all. I don’t know. . .

Change topic~~~ I bought a loaf of bread on my way home. Because I know I’ll be very lazy to cook for myself when I get home. I walked alone by the way. I pray now. I mean, I constantly pray now. Like every step I make, I pray. It’s really scary, if you know what I mean. You walk in the training room when the sun is no longer there and you get out of the room before the sun rises. SO it’s basically dark, I mean night time. I walk in a very fast pace as if I was power walking so that if ever someone is following me, [which I hope will never happen] they wouldn’t suspect that I was walking away from them or whatever. You get me, right? I plan to bring a rock or a stick the next time I go to class/work [whatever], just for emergency cases. And I do hope you’ll pray for me too.

Going back to the topic earlier, I think the account is okay but I don’t know about the clients or I don’t know about me, rather. I’m a bit of a passive listener or something at times and I’m afraid I wouldn’t be able to understand them in their unique accents. But I’ll try. First times are always scary. And I guess that’s the reason why I’m still a virgin [in work and in body?]. Oh em. Just please bear with me. I’m effin tired right now. But I’m not complaining. Really. This is my choice. And I’m sticking to it. For now, that is. And is it so crazy that, just now, one hospital I applied to is emailing me about an upcoming exam? This is just great [insert sarcasm here] ! But sssssh., don’t tell anyone just yet. Haven’t told my parents or my sister about it.

Sooooo,,, Tonight…I mean today I’m officially gonna fuck up my sleeping pattern. So basically what will happen right after this blog are….

  1. I’ll eat my brunch at 7am
  2. Play Sims 3 till 9am
  3. And sleep. ZzzzZzzz
  4. Wake up at 5:30 pm.

Cheers! 😉

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